I am an Oklahoman by birth, a Texan by current living situation, but claim the world as my playground.I love to travel and hope to someday soon take our family on adventures to far off lands, where we can share God with others and experience all the wonders He has created.
I am a mother of 4 crazy, homeschooling children ages 9 & under, wife to an amazing man, and daughter of the King of the Universe!I enjoy reading, making my kids laugh, cooking, all things natural, learning to play guitar and dusting off my piano skills.One day I hope to run again, but until then I’m learning patience.
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When It’s Just Too Much
The tears keep coming today and at first I couldn’t figure out why.
I’m trying not to be frustrated.
It’s just one of those days where I come to God and say,
“I can’t figure it out. I can’t think straight. My mind is going in all different directions and then it feel like I can’t think at all….”
Then my mind wanders and I can’t even seem to finish a prayer.
Trying to focus and get my mind to think clearly, I open my Bible.
I read varying passages from the books of the Bible that have been gaining my attention lately: James, I Samuel and Philippians.
I’ve been singing a song based on Philippians 3:10 to my children lately:
“I want to know Christ and the power of his rising.
Share in his suffering conform to his death.
When I pour out my life to be filled with his Spirit,.
Joy follows suffering and life follows death.”
As this song echoed in my mind and God’s powerful Word worked it’s way into my heavy heart, I realized I was overcome with sadness with all that is going on in the world right now.
Why? Why are people being mistreated, being killed, taken advantage of and used for the purpose of others. Between processing what’s happening in Venezuela, what happened in Charlottesville, birth and life not being valued, situations going on in my friends’ lives, and so many other things….my heart just hurts for this world. My heart hungers for God’s justice and for God to save so many from this torture and heartache.
It’s cliche but this world needs Jesus!
When I finally realized what was bothering me, all I wanted to do was run and pray. I decided I couldn’t leave the kids home alone, so I went and let out some energy by picking the weeds that had overtaken our patio.
It was the perfect time to pick weeds because it has been raining for two days. In an hour, thanks to the down pouring of rain, I was able to pick all the weeds that had over taken the area.
I couldn’t believe how many weeds there were and how big some had become. It’s been almost 3 months since I’d picked any weeds so it made logical sense that they had gotten so big and unruly. As I uprooted them, I realized something that these weeds and this world have in common.
What Weeds & the World Have in Common
If we, as people, nip problems in the bud when they are small, they won’t get overgrown and out of hand. We have let many of these things happen because we haven’t taken a united stand against them. We need to allow the outpouring of the Holy Spirit, given to each one of us as followers of Christ, to work in our lives so that we can tame the weeds of this world and pull them out by their roots!
We do this by going out to all the world (our neighbors, our coworkers, those God put’s in our paths) and disciplining them, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son & Holy Spirit, teaching them to obey Christ’s words (Matthew 28:19-20). As they grow in their faith and obedience to the Lord, the weeds will be picked out of their lives as they are continually being picked out of ours. Then they will continue the cycle.
Using the Outpouring of the Holy Spirit
We as a body of believers (and I’m speaking to myself here) are often more content praising God from our pews and in our Bible studies than praising Him in front of others and sharing how God has changed our lives.
If your heart has been hurting because of the events going on in this world, take heart! Jesus warned us there would be struggles but he also promised us His Spirit, which would allow us to do great things while living on this earth.
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.
Jesus, John 16:33
This sky was God showing off his beauty as I finished picking the last of the weeds.
I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father.
Jesus John 14:12
It’s Time to Take a Stand
If your looking to making a difference this is the first step. Reach out to others and share Christ. Pray about how you can get involved in whatever is tugging at your heart the most and get involved.
Now is not the time to be afraid or to sit back and be overcome by this world. It’s time to take a stand and take action.
Hello. I grew up traveling the world as a military brat. I ultimately felt God's pull to Oklahoma Christian University where I met my husband. We now have 3 beautiful children and have settled in Mustang, Oklahoma.I am a homeschooling mom and with 3 kiddos it is a full time job! I am daily encouraged by God's great patience and grace in my life. In my free time I enjoy reading and crafting.
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What did God create you for?
Have you ever stopped to think about all the things that God did not intend for us in this life? I feel like some days I am constantly reminded of these things. Many evenings I will sit down and reflect back over my day. What were my general feelings today? What went right, and what didn’t? Did I get things done? And what did I put off or forget to do? What habits do I need to start to make me feel more successful? And on and on and on…
God gives us a full range of emotions to experience life to its very fullest. In my mind I can be the most fulfilled if I’m feeling generally more positive than negative. That’s my personal preference. Some people are like a piece of metal. When the heat is on they just bend and change to fit the temperature. Some people are more like a piece of paper and they just burn up. I’d like to think that I’m somewhere in the middle. As a result of my military upbringing, I am a pretty flexible person, regardless of my personality. However, having children and running my own household presents pressures and challenges that at times threaten to burn me up and leave behind a little pile of ashes.
Perseverance, not Exhaustion and Defeat
James 1:4 says, “Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Sometimes it seems as though perseverance for the sake of perseverance alone is the only thing I’ve got left. But God does not want us to feel downtrodden and hopeless. It is not His will for us to be exhausted and defeated by the day.
I love this whole chapter of Isaiah. The Lord is really encouraging His people and giving them comfort. God knows that our journey here on earth will not be easy. There are going to be bad days and tantrums. There is going to be spilled milk on the carpet and sand in their hair, dirty dishes and floors and toilets. I often dwell on and worry about these things and that was never God’s intent. God created me for more than my to-do list!
Letting Go and Letting God
I’m going to make a list for myself of what I am intentionally going to try and let go. Perhaps, this list will be helpful to you as well.
This week I will work to let go of the following:
- Distress over my housekeeping imperfections
- Incessant worrying about my children’s (insert your worry here)
- Frustration at other people because of (for me it’s their driving!)
- Jealousy over someone else’s blessings, calling, or opportunities
- Fixation with my idea of how everything should be
Considering I’m going to work on these for the next week, it’s a pretty long list; however, these are the things that God has revealed to me recently. Some of these things are issues I grapple with frequently while others are rather infrequent. I feel that each of these are relevant to God’s will for my life, and that these things are holding me back from other things God has for me in my life.
I pledge this week to work towards laying these concerns at the feet of Jesus and clothing myself in things that are pure, holy, and right.
Here are my really great reasons to work on this list. I’d like to make more room for these things!
Will you take this pledge with me?
If you’d like to, please share your list with us so we can be praying along with you about what God can take from you to make more room for Him!
Wife, mom, daughter, teacher, blogger, crafter, organizer - but most and best of all, I am a Christian. I am passionate about my family and my God. I am married to my best friend and am blessed with a one year old son who keeps me busy all the time staying at home with him. And I am glad to be in the service of our incredible and awesome God.
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When you’re in a dark place and it’s hard to find your way out, what do you do? You feel lost and alone, unnoticed and under the radar. You are shuffled and jostled about, people walking past you, even talking to you, but not really seeing you. Not really knowing you.
Are you there? Are you in that dark place?
Your best friend may not see your inner heart. Your preacher may not. Even your mom or your husband or your kids may not. You might be drowning and no one sends out the lifeboat.
But there is Someone who does.
He sees the struggles and the tears. He sees the heartache and the loneliness. You can’t fool him–he knows exactly how wonderful you are and how awful you can be too.
But those voices whisper in your heart.
Why would He care about me?
He can’t really love me that much. After all, he knows exactly what I have done!
Why bother? I know I can’t do it.
Friend, let me whisper to your heart as well.
Psalm 9:10 says,
And those who know your name put their trust in you,
for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you.
Consider Romans 8:32, which says,
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
When you’re feeling low and in that dark place, read these verses from 1 John 3:
By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.
It’s true. We don’t deserve God’s love and forgiveness. That’s the true meaning of grace: we get what we don’t deserve. He give us forgiveness and not punishment. We get a second chance and not death. We get salvation and not condemnation.
But God is amazing like that. He is greater than us, loves us more than we could possibly imagine, and gave up his son–before I even committed to serving Him.
That thought should humble me, motivate me, and comfort me, all at the same time. It is the lifeline you can cling to when you’re in that dark place. And it can be what helps pull you back into the light.
I am a happy wife and mother to my amazing husband and beautiful little girl and we are living the good life just outside of Oklahoma City. I was born and raised in Houston, Texas where both of my parents serve as ministers. With God’s great guidance, I ended up earning a degree in children’s ministry from Oklahoma Christian University! I am an extrovert and love to make friends and have deep conversations. My days are filled with the duties of motherhood and homemaking but when I find a moment to myself I enjoy reading cookbooks, blogs, and Karen Kingsbury’s books. I have a slight addiction to facebook and pinterest. Holidays are my favorite days. I love to cook meals that make people happy. I have a passion for family ministry and bible class teaching. Most importantly, my greatest desire to is to know my heavenly Father more each day.
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“Forgive and forget.”
It sounds so easy. I don’t like conflict so forgiveness usually comes quickly for me, but oh, the forgetting–that is where I have a hard time. The sting of past offenses stay with me, and the enemy uses them to distract me and even bring out sin I am ashamed of.
About ten years ago, I found out something had been said about me and it crushed me. To make the situation even more difficult to walk away from, this was not a person I could avoid. Someone I was going to be around for a long time had said these hurtful things. Despite my hurt and disappointment, I knew I was going to have to live with this remark and move on. I knew I didn’t want to hold a grudge, so I decided to take the comment for what it was worth and forgive in my heart.
Don’t Let Hurtful Words Destroy
As I said, this person is a part of my life, and whom I love. I’ve had good times with this person as well. In fact, I’ve even grown a little as the comment has helped me. However, that doesn’t mean I’m without memory of what happened. To this day I cringe when the memory pops up. I often feel intimidated and insecure around this person, all because of that one comment made ten years ago. The enemy wants to stir up past wounds and put anger in our hearts. He is out to destroy our godly relationships with others and wreak chaos in God’s kingdom. We can’t let that happen. We must put into practice the instructions offered in Colossians:
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them together in perfect unity.
How Can I Forgive?
I don’t believe I have to forget about my past grievances in order to forgive. I just need to be able to handle these hurts with:
- compassion, as I seek to understand my offender’s point of view and situation;
- kindness, as I choose to be respectful and pleasant despite how I’ve been treated;
- humility, as I examine myself, and my own fault, realizing that I need Jesus to make me whole;
- gentleness, as I respond to offenses, with my words, thoughts, and actions;
- and patience, as I understand that this might happen again, and it might be difficult to move on.
When I read the phrase “Bear with each other,” it reminds me of ongoing struggles. It tells me there will be those who drive me crazy and might even upset me, but it’s not my right to hold a grudge. I’m to bear and forgive. I’m to live with it, and move on, realizing that the only perfect one is Christ.
Above all, I must remember to love. Strong’s Concordance defines this agape love as benevolent. It’s a love we give, not because it has been earned, not because we “feel” it, but because it is the right thing to do.
Bearing Each Other is Hard Labor
Learning how to move past my offenses in a godly way has been life-changing for me. I wish I could say that it’s easy, but “bearing each other” is hard labor. We should take the step of forgiveness, but we mustn’t forget that our relationship with that person isn’t over yet. The regard we hold each other in and the way we interact is important. We will likely feel the sting again, but we can move forward in love if we take on the characteristics described in Colossians 3. It is also helpful to remember that our enemy is Satan–not each other.
“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”
We must move past the grievances we have toward one another so that God’s kingdom is made stronger.
Do You Have Unforgiven Past Hurts?
What past hurts are lingering in your heart? Are you open to bearing and forgiving? It sounds hard, but you don’t have to do this on your own. You have a Father who understands because he continues to lavish his children with perfect forgiveness and reconciliation. Our Lord can empower you to bear and forgive, offering you the support you need. Won’t you seek Him?
Father God, You are Lord of the universe, yet you seek us out, one by one, drawing us to you in perfect reconciliation. Thank you for the forgiveness and life you offer us through your son. Thank you for your presence in our life and may we draw strength from you as we seek to have compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience in our relationships with others, bearing with each other and forgiving. Forgive us for the times we struggle to forgive and fail to take on these characteristics. Give us strength and wisdom to be united as your church in love. In Jesus Name, Amen
I'm Lori! My husband and I have been married since 2008. We adopted our son in July and live in Memphis, TN. One of the things I love about Creating a Great Day is that it is focused on inspiring women to the woman that God wants them to be. Every woman is different, and we all have talents to honor God and walk alongside each other in this spiritual journey called life. Have a blessed day!
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Anxiety has affected my physical, emotional, and spiritual health. It has negatively impacted relationships and interfered with my connection with God. For the longest time, I thought it was all my fault. Then the blame game started.
With some of the “well-intended” advice I’ve heard, it’s not hard to start blaming yourself. Statements like these always haunt me:
- “Relax, don’t worry so much.”
- “You can’t have a good relationship with God if you are anxious.”
- “You should just trust God more.”
Misguided Efforts to Reduce Our Anxiety
In attempts to reduce anxiety, we actually combine our anxiety with guilt and shame. Anxious questions turn into doubt. Doubt turns into fear of the unknown or unexpected. This fear allows negative, emotional statements to develop that we then internalize. This twisted sense of reality can create a treacherous mindset about ourselves and the world around us.
Over the past three years, multiple changes happened in my life. Job changes, adopting our son, becoming a mother….all of these changes are blessings, but they can also invite anxiety. I’ll admit, I’m tired of fighting this battle within my mind and heart. So, I started to reflect on why anxiety is so interwoven in my life, no matter how hard I try to “get rid of it.” I realized that my anxiety, at any time, distracts me from being the woman of God that I need to be. It keeps me from pursuing the fruits of the Spirit to engage with God, my family, and my community.
Satan is Behind Anxiety
What is the best way to get to women? Get them to doubt (or question) their role. Get them to shame themselves and lose sight of who and what is really important. Here is the key reflection. Who truly benefits from my disconnection from God? Satan.
One of my faith mentors reminded me that Satan is among us, trying to intervene in our family’s walk with the Lord. Ladies, let’s stop trying to fight the internal battle of shame, anxiety, and doubt. Let’s call anxiety out for what it is: one of the best ways for Satan to distract us in our faith. I want to be clear. There are things that I know I should do to work on my anxious behaviors. I should reflect on our lives, identifying ways in which I can deflect the Enemy. For far too long, I (and other women) have owned our anxiety a little bit too much. We have made it so much about ourselves that Satan is rejoicing in our negative emotions and distractions from God.
Do you recognize these verses?
All of these verses focus on worry, anxiety, and/or trusting God. For someone who has struggled with anxiety for years, these verses always shamed me. I felt like I was living a good Christian life, then these verses hit me like a sack of bricks. They knocked me down right to the starting line again. Anyone else feel this way? No matter how much you try to connect with God, these verses shackle you in shame?
A New Way of Thinking
Let me invite you into a new way of thinking. Don’t be shackled. Be set free. Remove your current lens on your anxiety and replace it with the lens that sees anxiety in its proper focus. It’s just another way for Satan to win a battle. It’s another way for him to get you thinking more about your bills, your relationship, your children, etc. more than your relationship with God. Anxiety is another way for him to interfere with the life journey you are on with the One who gives you peace.
During our first adoption, Romans 15:13 encouraged us so much. It says,
“May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in Him so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
Let’s be women who overflow with hope and be filled with joy and peace. Be set free. Connect with other sisters in Christ. Lean on them for support. Go to counseling, as your anxiety may be stemming from other unresolved adverse events and/or trauma. Talk with your significant other, as dealing with someone with anxiety is extremely challenging. And most important of all, pray for God to fill you with peace as both of you work to prevent Satan from infiltrating your life.
We stood there on opposite sides of the garage staring each other down. Letting the question hang there. Knowing the next few words from his mouth could–no, would–change everything.
In that moment, I doubted why I had asked. He hadn’t given me reason to question him. Yet after conversations with two friends struggling through their own answers to this question, I felt like I had to ask.
I had fasted, and I had prayed.
I thought I was ready for whatever his answer would be.
After all, I loved and respected this man. For better or for worse, I had promised to love this man.
As the words came, I crumbled. I was a mess of a woman on that cold concrete floor. I wasn’t ready for this.
“I mean, if I can’t handle it, I’ll tell you,” he said. Then I knew–he hadn’t been faithful to me.
Some will say, “It’s just with his eyes.” To me it was everything. No one had ever hurt me so deeply. No one had ever betrayed me to that level. I had never let anyone in that close before him. It was out of nowhere. I was lost and broken, gasping for air.
He knew how much I hated pornography. My heart ached for sex-trafficked victims, and he knew that. He knew the broken woman I once was and how close I had been to becoming one of those women myself.
He had hurt me, yes, but he also made me sick.
This man was the father to my children. This man who had studied the Bible with me, who had prayed with me, who had loved me was, all the while, sinning against me and our vows. He had lusted after other women. He had done this in our home, on his phone, and on our television.
I hated him.
Now, I hated all of those things. Looking at them reminded me of his betrayal. He came to me, crumpled on the garage floor.
I cringed at his touch.
We sat there for what felt like forever.
Finally I asked, “Where do we go from here?”
Equipped through God’s Grace
That night, neither of us had any idea what the next two years would look like. By his grace, God equipped me to love my husband through this dark time in our marriage. God’s grace has given him strength to fight the desire of his flesh, seek accountability, and submit himself to boundaries that are at times frustrating.
We have both learned a lot in the past two years. I’ve learned a lot about grace, God, and walking in this gift of marriage.
Here are a few of my take-aways from this dark and painful time. I hope these lessons I’ve learned will bless any other woman walking through a similar battlefield.
1) Be in the Word.
When all this happened, I was just finishing Beth Moore’s study on James. I know without a doubt that had I not been deep in the Word of God for weeks leading up to this, my faith would have faltered even more.
I had memorized more scripture than I ever had before. Without it I was lost.
I’m not saying I never doubted God’s plan. I’m not saying I never questioned the purpose of this life we are living together. I am saying knowing and relying on scripture is one of the few things that helped me get out of bed every morning.
These verses in particular, which I had memorized weeks before, anchored my storm-tossed mind and soul.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Most days I did not find this trial to be pure joy, but God’s Word encouraged me to see the joy in the situation.
Another verse, which I often pray I will be able to say before the Lord one day, came back to me over and over.
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race. I have kept the faith.
2 Timothy 4:7
2) God is faithful.
I doubted He was there with me. I doubted where He had been as my husband walked down this road to destruction.
But He was there.
He was there, grieving with us. He was there, prompting my husband to walk away from the computer. On the days, weeks, and months that my husband did not betray me, God was there, giving him strength.
Again, the words of James were aptly timed for just this moment in my life. These words helped me to reconcile our sinful temptations with the Lord who walks with us by His Holy Spirit.
When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, not does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full grown, gives birth to death.
3) This wasn’t about me.
Let me say it again: this isn’t about me!
It hurt me, it broke me, it made me grow. It made me stronger, but in the end, it was about my husband, his experiences, and his personal struggle with sin.
This was the most difficult lesson. One I still have to be reminded of regularly. This was my opportunity to be gracious, to be an example of mercy to my husband.
Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom, because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful.
Mercy triumphs over judgement! That brings me to my next lesson.
4) I can’t do this alone.
Jesus Christ didn’t come to earth and disciple one man. He discipled many, and established a church. We need the church in our brokenness. I’m not saying go out and shout your husband’s sin from the pulpit. I am saying wisely and prayerfully seek out one or two women to encourage you during this season. You will be amazed at the women God brings to you. These women will love you when you hurt and encourage you to be Christ-like when you don’t want to be Christ-like anymore. Women who will pray with you, cry with you, check in on you, and just be with you.
Is any of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise…and the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
James 5:13, 15-16
5) Lastly, and most importantly, Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior, not my husband.
I had him on a pedestal. His desire, love, and admiration fueled me. After almost ten years of marriage, I had forgotten that my value and purpose is from the Lord. None of us are perfect–not my husband, and definitely not me.
For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking it all.
My husband can’t save me and I can’t save him. Jesus Christ took care of that almost 2,000 years ago.
There are still days I fight to control the images and thoughts in my mind. There are days I just want to cry in my best friend’s arms, and I hate that the one who comforts me is also the one who hurt me.
Satan Seeks to Destroy Marriages
Sin is gross. It hurts. Sin is dark.
Sexual sin destroys trust beyond comprehension.
Satan is prowling like a lion seeking to devour each and every one of our marriages. He is seeking to destroy the most intimate and grace-filled institution that represents Christ’s love for us.
Be on guard. Stay in the Word. Devote yourself to prayer. And…
…put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Ephesians 6:13 (emphasis added)